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A Reset for 2019

Where do I even begin this post? 2018 was both the best year and worst year of my life…

Let’s start with the good before getting to the bad and how I plan on changing things up for 2019…

The Great Moments

Baby Evelynne

What can be better then adding our baby girl Evelynne into our family! She is the happiest, easy going baby that lights up the room with her smiles and giggles. Every morning I look forward to my good morning kisses and snuggles with my baby girl. This was one of the 4 best moments of my life when she was born at 2am on January 1st.

A New Car

For years, I have been driving beater cars because I couldn’t afford to finance a car plus my credit score was crap. Doug’s credit wasn’t much better but we need to improve his score so we can purchase a family home for our kids. After many attempts at purchasing a new truck for Doug, he decided a safer car for the kids and I would be better for everyone. The timing was perfect because we have been dealing with tire issues, motor mount issues and other issues with the car which seemed to increase by the week lately. A Facebook ad popped up an older Lexus, fully loaded, in amazing condition with low mileage which intrigued Doug to put in an application to finance the car. 10 days before Christmas, I drove home my Christmas gift! She’s a beauty and I love my new car aka Roxy! (Who else names their cars?)

Cricut Maker and Easy Press 2

Another early Christmas gift that my husband gave me was the new Cricut Maker and Easy Press 2 so that I could start my shirt and bag portion of my business. I have been wanting/asking for a cricut for years and this new cricut maker is AMAZING! I mean there is nothing this machine can’t make though I am still learning how to work many of its features. Plus, the Easy Press 2 has made making dancers and dance mom shirts and bags SOOOO much easier!

Now for the bad..

Did He Cheat?

Evelynne was 2 weeks old when I received a random Facebook message from someone I didn’t know. This wasn’t uncommon since I am always selling things on Marketplace so I assumed it was someone looking to purchase something. The first line flipped my whole world upside down and changed who I am forever. This random girl with a made up Facebook name told me in the span of 7 messages that my husband was having sex with her, not wearing his wedding ring and she paid our recent cellphone bill. I confronted my husband who denied cheating and says he didn’t know who this girl even was but suspected it had to do with his ex. His excuse was that this girl was setup by his ex that he gave me a little girl that he didn’t give her. I sat in my bed, holding my newborn baby girl and just cried. The past year has been a blur of depression and anxiety because I just function the best I can until I end up in tears or having a panic attack.

As for this random girl, Sunshine as a first name is more then likely made up to hide her true identity though I later found out her real name and where she lives. My husband doesn’t know how much I found out about this person.

Writing this has the tears flowing like it happened minutes ago. I don’t know if the pain of this will ever go away which whether he did cheat or not, Doug doesn’t understand why I can’t just let it go and move on. How do you just let something like this go when it is a he said/she said situation but certain details scream out at me that this random girl shouldn’t know!

Yes, I chose to stay in my marriage and keep my family intact for the time being to give my husband the benefit of the doubt. It has NOT been an easy task when some days I want to scratch his eyes out and somedays I want to hide from the world and just cry. We are supposed to be working on our marriage which seems to be a lot of hot air from him but this will be part of my blog in 2019.

My Mom’s Diagnosis

For as long as I can remember, my Mom hasn’t felt good. She has seen many doctors and received different diagnosis as to what it could be but they just didn’t seem to fit all of her symptoms. Finally, this year we received the answers that have been sought after for over 20 years… she has an autoimmune liver disease called PBC. This disease will eventually require her to have a liver transplant. My mom having it makes the females in our family highly susceptible to ending up with it as well. I did some testing and I have the markers but so far my liver bloodwork has come back as normal. This is will be a future post that I will explain more about the disease and squash the assumptions because people hear liver and think alcohol.

No Health Answers for Myself

What’s so frustrating is that my mom got her answers finally and what I thought was my answer, anemia, was not my answer at all. With my pregnancy, my iron and ferritan levels were so low that I had to see a hematologist and start on infusions. The hematologist told me that all the symptoms that I have been living with for years was due to undiagnosised anemia that my body was reacting to like my arms and legs randomly going numb, the spots in my eye, the fatigue, the pure weakness I feel all day, everyday etc. With our new insurance, I had to see a new PCP which ran an extensive amount of bloodwork, only to find out that now my iron levels are fine and just see her back in 3 months. 3 more months of pain and exhaustion while caring for a toddler and running a business? UMM HELL NO! I need and want answers not just live with all of this and see her again in a few month. WTF why don’t doctors care enough to try and find answers anymore?

The Bad parts of 2018 could go on and on with our being forced out of house we had been renting for a few years because someone else bought it and didn’t know the laws in our state for buying a rental property to the mounting medical bills to the slow restart to my handmade business. I don’t want to be a total Negatve Nelly so I am going to stop here with the bad

Reset for 2019

I am a self admitted, self help book Audible junkie and fell in love with Mel Robbins book “The 5 Second Rule” this year. It really has helped motivate me to try new things and even push past the pain I am in to get things done. I was super duper excited to see that Mel is starting a new program in 2019 called #mindsetreset which will help get your mind out of the gutter its been in and reset into something you want your mind and life to be. I need this to get out of my funk and depression.

I want so much more out of 2019 like a successful business, a healthy body, loving marriage and happy family. Even if these things don’t turn out the way I want, at least I can say that I tried. I can’t wait to get back into blogging and track my progress in my life. My blog will be more about chatting about my life as a mom, an entrapreuner, a wife and a woman. I would have loved to continue showing off my cooking/baking/crafty side but when something becomes so overwhelming that you shut down, it is not a right fit for the moment. I love talking and relating to other women that could be going through the same struggles that I am going through because we are never alone.

If you want to join in on Mel Robbins’ #mindsetreset check out her website: Mel Robbins Mindset Reset

I look forward to chatting with all of you in 2019!

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2 Strawberry Infused Water Recipes for the Summer

Summertime is coming which means lots of fresh fruits and herbs to enjoy. It also means lots of heat so hydration is important. I’m not one that likes to drink water just plain… I need some taste to my water. One of the best ways to add taste to my water is by infusing it with fruits, veggies and herbs.

When Summer comes so does all of those delicious fruits, veggies and herbs. Plus, when our local grocery stores put some of the fresh fruits on sale I will stock up and freeze them for my waters. Last week, our local grocery store had a super coupon which I had to use… 2 pounds of strawberries for $1.99! I bought 4 pounds which Danyella ate just about 2 pounds herself. The other 2 pounds were cut and frozen. Plus, the best part of freezing the strawberries is they double as ice cubes.

Everyone talks about how the infused waters are great for detoxing your body and other health benefits. I am focusing more on the taste with my infused waters because just drinking water helps to detox the body and gives so many health benefits. I a bottle from a tea company because it has an infuser built into the lid so the leaves don’t get out while I am drinking the water. I use 2 bottles because while I am drinking one then the other one is infusing.

These are my 2 favorite strawberry infused water recipes for the summer:

Strawberry Lemon Basil Infused Water:

1 cup strawberries; sliced or cut

1/2 lemon; sliced or cut

3-4 basil leaves, fresh

16+ ounces of water

Add the strawberries, lemon and basil to the water jug of your choice. Add your water over the fruit then store in the fridge until you are ready to drink it. I will continue to add water to my bottle through the day while I am switching between my 2 bottles. The fruit continues to infuse the water throughout the day and still tastes yummy.

Strawberry Mint Infused Water:

1 cup strawberries; sliced or cut

3-4 mint leaves; fresh

Add the strawberries and mint to the water jug of your choice. Add your water over the fruit then store in the fridge until you are ready to drink it. I will continue to add water to my bottle through the day while I am switching between my 2 bottles. The fruit continues to infuse the water throughout the day and still tastes yummy.

*Another alternative to the mint is using chocolate mint, which I plan I finding a chocolate mint plant soon so I can try it. Chocolate Mint Strawberry water sounds divine!

I love hearing new ideas so what are your favorite infused waters to drink?

 

 

 

 

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Thankful for My Healthy Baby

Thankful for my healthy baby girlAs Evelynne turns 2 months today, I am thankful for our healthy baby girl. Our dear, sweet Evie was a miracle, our rare unicorn because I had a hard time keeping a pregnancy to stick. Before Evie’s pregnancy I had miscarriages and was told that as I age, the harder it was going to be to get a pregnancy to stick. When the lines appeared that I was pregnant, I was skeptical and assumed I would miscarry again.

Every week that we gained, I became a little more excited that this baby would stick. We reached 16 weeks and the doctors started me on a shot to help prevent preterm delivery which I had with both my oldest 2 kids. I began contracting at 17 weeks and put on bedrest. Every week until she reached 24 weeks was a blessing because we needed her to be at least 24 weeks to be delivered and have a chance at survival. My baby girl lasted until 39 weeks!

In my baby mom group, there is the sweetest little boy that is struggling for his life. He was born premature with complications. When he was born, the doctors told the parents he wouldn’t survive more then a few days and that was in October. My heart broke for her as she struggled with this news but that little boy has proved those doctors wrong because today is March 1st and he is still with his mom and dad. Recently, his parents were told he has a heart condition which normally could have surgery to correct and help it but due to his size and condition, they refused to do the surgery. The doctors told the parents that the baby wouldn’t survive. I have cried reading the updates from his mom because I couldn’t image going through this with my kids.

I have seen other parents struggle with diseases their children are suffering from either from knowing them personally, reading their stories on the internet or watching a heart wrenching movie based on their story. This morning, I was participating in my blog sharing with other bloggers and someone posted a video of a little girl making the best of her life though she lives with a rare disease. These kids and families are so strong and inspiring for other to be grateful for everything they have in their lives, especially their health.

In a world filled with scary situations, diseases and people, I am holding my children a little tighter because they are safe and healthy. Today and everyday, I am so grateful that my Evie was born healthy and has continued to stay healthy. I am thankful for the smiles and coos that she gives us. I am thankful for the joy she brings to every moment of everyday for the past 2 months. My baby girl is getting so big so fast!

Please say an extra Prayer for Baby Braydon today because he can use every prayer right now.

Thankful for my HealthyBaby

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What the What Wednesdays

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Anyone that knows me, knows that there are things that bother me. Sometimes it is small pet peeves, sometimes it is how someone in my life is acting, sometimes it is how someone is treating someone else, sometimes it is a general frustration in my life that I need to work through. I know I am not alone when it comes to the need to vent your frustrations about life. So I am making Wednesdays….. What the What Wednesdays!

What the What Wednesdays will be my day to vent my frustrations which is fitting because Thursday is Thankful Thursday. So I will vent on Wednesday, let it all go and be Thankful on Thursday for what is in me life.

So who is with me on having days that you just need to vent about life or people or things going on? Right now, I know for me, I need to release some of the frustrations going on in my life because the longer I bottle it up, the more pressure builds up and then I will explode. Anyone that has been on my receiving end of my explosion knows it is a scary, scary sight so the release is necessary.

Needing a release from stress and frustrations is for everyone. This release needs to be a healthy release like journal writing, yoga, exercise, blogging (this is my release), talking to friends or many other healthy ways. I encourage each of you to find your healthy way to vent and release your frustrations to keep a healthy mind, body and soul.

My Vent For the Week: At this moment, my frustration is my husband and his need to clean my stuff or unpack my stuff. I am an artist so I live in a state of organized chaos when it comes to all of my stuff. I know where all of my (ok most of my stuff) is and do not like any of it to be touched. This is where my control freak comes out because I like my stuff where I put it so I don’t need anyone else organizing for me. He is driving me up the freaking wall with touching my stuff! Ok vent over… for now haha!

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Dry as the Sahara

Dry As the sahara

For 35, almost 36 years, I have HATED drinking water with a passion! There was just no taste to it, whereas juices, sodas, teas and coffee, all had a taste that I enjoyed. So lets just say, I have spent my entire life overindulging in sweet drinks to attempt to hydrate my body. What a mistake, that I am paying for now!

I have always had dry skin but I really thought it was just the type of skin I have and kept on ignoring my body’s request for pure water, not water mixed with something yummy. You have read about how I lack any energy to do much after I am done working and how I have no control over my increased appetite (especially for something sweet). I mean it just seemed easier to ignore all the signs that I was dehydrating my body and essentially killing it.

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Since challenging myself to get the body I desire, which doesn’t just mean losing the extra pounds I have gained but re-energizing my body and my mind, I have started to do research on what foods and drinks were best for me to partake in. Well the number one thing that was repeated over and over and over…. Drinking water can heal my symptoms!

Drinking water can help with my skin problems, fatigue and lack of energy, joint and muscle aches, IBS problems and so much more but I now have to undo the years of abuse I caused my body by dehydrating it for sooooo long. So I began to research how much water I should be drinking and found a great article that breaks down that each person is different according to weight and activity level. I found out for my 150 pound, low activity body that I need to drink 100 ounces of water everyday. That is alot…. hell I think I drink that much coffee in a day but how am I going to drink that much water??? (to check out the article and chart go to Slender Kitchen’s article!

As I was researching and realizing how much I need to drink these 100 ounces of water, I set out to make a plan. I downloaded WaterMinder on my Iphone so I can input how much water, juice, coffee etc and watch how much more I need to drink to hit my goal. The app will send me reminder notifications to drink water to stay hydrated which is a nice thing because working, running a business, taking care a child, boyfriend, puppy and a house tends to make me forget things easily!

Then I went to Walmart, bought a gallon of water, marked it “DO NOT DRINK” and set it in my fridge so that I can watch my progress of drinking that gallon of water everyday. So far I have averaged half of the gallon everyday so about 60 ounces of water. I won’t lie it has been a struggle to get it down but each day its been a little easier to drink a little more water and a little less sweet things.

I am going to feature a daily post on my Facebook business page with an update on my water intake for 30 days. I am going to record how I am feeling, when I miss my goal and how its been making my body go from the Sahara to an ocean of hydrating water! If you want to follow my journey on my Facebook page Click on Kaella Boutique

Here is a great poster with facts about how water and dehydration affects the body:

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Healthy Mind Challenge

I thought that the hardest part was getting myself to actually eat healthy but that is not true at all! The harde0e53047c767c12f4efdbbe47e27e052dst part has been to get my mind inline with my body and my desire for a healthy body. I am not going to lie… I fell off the healthy eating wagon more then once this past week.
After I took the last bite of a devil dog or ice cream or pasta, I felt the twinges of remorse and wanting to throw up for what I had just done.

I never really had decided to do a lifestyle change liks this before so mentally I was not prepared. Honestly, I thought I could wing it as I go…. WRONG!!! WRONG WRONG WRONG! You have to plan out your meals and set up a time everyday to exercise or you will fail miserably or at least in the beginning.

I learned after this first week that just winging it was not the right mindset at all because you need that structure to retrain your brain to live and breathe healthy in your life. After a set back, all you can do is pick yourself up,  try again and learn from your mistakes in the future. I definetely need to take the time to plan my meals and exercise for the week or I will fall into the same trap as I did this past week which is endulge the urge and regret it later. Nope lesson learned!